Chicana on the Edge

Disclaimer: since I've become properly obese, I re-read these old posts and see my body dysmorphia and obsession with food and weight. It's sad to me now. I have heard from someone I haven't seen since we graduated from high school together (he found me through my...

When I was very depressed, but before my doctor and I figured out the right medication, I wrote a lot of songs and performed very regularly. There’s a myth of creativity that the best art comes out of the worst suffering and while I don’t think that’s always true, I...

I'll be creating my living will soon, making explicit what I'd like done in case I'm ever unable to make my own medical decisions. So let's deal with the possibility of death full-on here. What do you want for your funeral? All I know is that I don't want "Amazing...

If you live in the Chicago area:I've received an email from my former place of worship, Unity in Chicago, about a workshop next week on creating a living will. A living will is a document which lets you decide whether or not to be kept on artificial life support....

(another double shift. WHEN will I ever have time again for more than a short blurb?????)In the film Castaway, Tom Hanks' character is madly in love with Helen Hunt's, but then he spends four years on an island and when he comes back, she's married and has a child. In...

Today was my day off from work. Because the restaurant is still understaffed and we're all working about 7 or more shifts a week, I consider myself lucky to get one day off a week. Unfortunately, a co-worker had a personal emergency that required that the rest of us...

Today I had my first cigarette. I wanted to try to understand what people get out of it. I smoked the whole thing, waiting for the feeling that many addicts got the first time they smoked. I waited for the sensation that makes people want to do it again. It didn't...

Many people say life's too short. I say life's too long. (Click here for the article.)And Happy Birthday to my sister, Judy! (because gloomy pessimism doesn't preclude celebration)

Here are some other places to go for a much more informed discussion than I could ever lead:http://ampmramblings.blogspot.com/http://perpetualrefugee.blogspot.com/Other suggestions?(A temporary cease-fire has been violated by Israel "only" to defend its ground forces...

I just can't blog about my usual trivial crap when Israel is bombing the hell out of Lebanon, even more outrage at the U.S. (for not doing what it can to stop it) is growing everywhere except in the U.S. and Israel, and we are once again seeing the Bush...

In response to everyone's comments about my 40th birthday: the 30's sucked dog penis. I can't say it enough. If the 40's contain half the desperation, loneliness and suicidal fantasies, they will be better.Yes (Mr. Underhill), birthday cake! I have had lots of it over...