Chicana on the Edge

Mentioning the unmentionable since 2004

How I meet men
written by Regina Rodríguez-Martin
May 25, 2005

I’m answering this question asked by Modigli: Where do you meet these men you have been going on dates with?

In my 23 years of dating, I have met men using every strategy I’ve ever heard of, including blind dating, online dating (various websites), speed dating, dating men I’ve met at work, in my apartment building, in cafes, at church, at synagogue and while doing things like hobbies, volunteer work, political activity, singing in a band, performing my music, going to class and riding public transportation. But these days I mainly just date men I meet through the Chicago Reader Matches online website. (the dating part, not the x-rated part [yes, look if you must]). I just leave my profile up and every once in a while someone sends me an email and we correspond and sometimes meet. I have had very good experiences with online dating. I’ve only met quality men, that is, men who were nice, attractive, financially stable, usually well-educated, accomplished and interesting. It’s just that none of my online dating has led to a relationship.

I’ve noticed that during the times when I’ve most actively dated online, I’ve also met men in other ways so that my active dating periods tend to be very active. After a few months (or several) I’ll become discouraged or just bored and “hide” my online profiles and go into a period of dating dormancy. Eventually I’ll feel rested and ready to give it another try and then I come out of dating “retirement” and do it all over again. It’s not a bad way to live except when I’m feeling depressed which I often do.

Question for women readers: do you agree with the two dating suggestions for men that I put in yesterday’s post?

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