When I was single (for most of my life), I used to consider couples who were celebrating their 25th anniversary, or their 50th or even their 10th, and think that the point of being married was to stay married for a very long time. I thought you must have to start...
[The following discussion is completely academic and philosophical with no connection to anything real that has ever happened, anywhere.] Given that the members of a family have the longest history together, know each other the best and have had the most time to build...
So, in 2007 the spinster and the bachelor moved in together. I was 40, he was 44. I had spent 12 years living alone, he had spent even longer. Because I knew I'd need plenty of space (and patience) as I adapted to life in a couple, we deliberately melded our lives in...
So my husband went on vacation in August, all by himself. I enjoyed very much having the apartment to myself, eating whenever I wanted and falling asleep without the white noise machine blaring to drown out his snoring. It reminded me of my old spinster days when I...
Back when I was single (a little over a year ago legally and three years ago in practice), I used to wonder what it would be like to be married. It seemed unfair that the general answer seemed to be "Every marriage is different." What the heck did that mean? Why...
[Yes, I've given my blog a new look, but it's still me.] When I was young I had a best friend. She was my favorite person in the world. We had lots of fun. Then a new girl entered the picture and my best friend eventually decided to be her best friend and to stop...
On June 20 I posted that Facebook fails to draw me because I'd rather talk to friends in person than online. That was a comparison between blogging/emailing and having live friends in the room with me. But it's damn hard to get live people in the same room with me....
In the spring of 2004, almost exactly five years ago, I had a do-nothing job that gave me hours in front of an online connection every day. I was just emerging from a period of social isolation. I had few friends, longed for a romantic relationship and had a lot of...
One year ago today, Bob and I married and my spinsterhood ended. One year down, 49 to go. Good thing we're just in our 40's...
At the beginning of the year, I became convinced that a new year's resolution support group was just the thing I needed to help me with some health and relationship goals. I sent an email to all my women friends and asked who wanted to meet. Only a few replied and...
I think grown ups, for the most part, suck at friendship and we often have no good role models for it. When I was growing up, no one modeled successful adult friendship for me and I'm only just now (age 42 1/2) learning how to become and stay friends with women. It's...
It’s the Christmas season when everyone’s calendar fills up with family gatherings and visiting friends and various holiday activities, plus all the Christmas shopping and/or baking and/or cooking, all on top of our usual routine of work, errands and family. What’s...
I wore a button that said "Latinos for Obama" every day I was there.
On the first day of our honeymoon, my husband and I wandered into a bookstore. I happened to notice one title, Why Women Shouldn't Marry: Being Single By Choice and I picked it up. I was a spinster for too long to not find this book irresistible. My new husband...
Honeymoon was fabulous (still waiting on my husband to download his photos), but now it's time to get busy on the Obama campaign! This is the real event of the fall. The Biden-Palin debate was fine: Joe Biden came off as polite and knowledgeable and I loved that he...