Most of my life I went around feeling afraid of many things: friendship, male attention, physical pain, family members, children, people being nice to me, etc. It made sense for me to try to look intimidating and stand-offish, so people would leave me alone. I kept a...
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Defense Against Multiple Assailants
Most sexual assault (93%) is committed by a single criminal, but in case you want to be ready for multiple attackers, here's the self defense course for you. IMPACT Defense Against Multiple Assailants October 17 & 18 (Sat/Sun 11 a.m. to 5 p.m.) Knapp Center...
Please Tip Always
If you're at a fundraiser or grand opening or another special event where the bar is either free or subsidized, still tip! A dollar a drink is good, even if you're having club soda. Club soda is my standard drink. Even though you're not paying for your own drink, the...
How To Cancel Service
I've been having Internet connection problems for weeks now (it started on 20 March) and have finally had it with Comcast. I'm cancelling service this week and switching back to AT&T. I only left AT&T because Comcast had a good deal back in 2013 when I moved...
What Do They Do if You’re in a Coma?
No one who's in perfectly good health ever thinks they need to worry about ending up in the hospital tomorrow, but things happen. I'm sure you can think of people who were fine one day and then, in a moment, it all changed. They didn't think they needed to make known...
IMPACT Self-Defense for Women
You can take the IMPACT Core Program in a weekend. This past weekend I spent Friday night, all day Saturday and all day Sunday attending a weekend workshop on how to defend myself against an assailant, even though I don't live in a lot of fear about that. I've been...
What Not to Say When Someone Dies, Part II
When someone is telling you about a death in the family, or when you're at a wake or a funeral, try not to let your personal feelings about death get in the way. The friends and family of a bereaved person often see the death as a horrifying thing and make...
What Not to Say When Someone Dies, Part I
When trying to give emotional support to someone experiencing the death of a loved one, don't: - express your gratitude that you aren't going through a similar experience. - mention that hearing of this death reminds you to check your own health. - turn to your...
EFT for Pet Problem Behaviors
My Fellow Dog Owners (or "Doggie Moms" if you prefer, whatever) - Here's an impressive way to connect with your dog, whether or not you have actual issues with him/her. Emotional Freedom Technique uses the meridians and energy points of Chinese medicine to release...
“Use Your Best Judgment”
When someone says "use your best judgment" they're not being specific about what they want. It's a worrying phrase to me because when someone uses it, they're often trying to warn me to meet some standard of behavior or dress, but they're being unclear. "Use...
How to Avoid Visiting Family for the Holidays, without Lying
This is merely a public service. I am not talking about the family I just visited last weekend (uh, hi Dad). Family gatherings are often fun and pleasant. This post is just for those few people who have family they'd rather avoid. 1. If you have a job with vacation...
How to Throw a Party and Still Have Fun
It's party season, so let's get ready! I love having people over, an option that makes increasing sense as we all whittle down our entertainment budgets and try to stay close to home. Maybe you're thinking, "How does that save costs if I'm providing food and drink for...
Saying the Right Thing
Let's say your name is Chris and you have a friend named Rita. Let's say you see her right outside of your usual coffee shop, while she's carrying her latte out and you’re on your way in for your morning pick-me-up. You say, "Rita, what's up?" She steps out of the way...
How to Be Friends
I think grown ups, for the most part, suck at friendship and we often have no good role models for it. When I was growing up, no one modeled successful adult friendship for me and I'm only just now (age 42 1/2) learning how to become and stay friends with women. It's...
How to Get Job Help from Your Friends
The text of an email I sent to most of the people for whom I have email addresses: Hey, everyone - After launching a job search in October, leaving the waitressing job in January, taking a long-term temporary assignment in February and becoming very discouraged and...